I had a star studded night at church last night as I looked around and half the people who's music I'd been jamming to this week were sitting in seats around me. Lots to report and not enough time to do it in. 6 am crept up like the Grinch who stole me sleep time and bit me!! I ignored it long enough to make myself late for the bus so I had to skip showering (EWW!!! You say?... Get over it. When I lived in Peru I'd skip showering for days!! It was life risking to stand under the appropriately named 'widow maker' that heated the water...but that's another story.) So, just a quick shiver under the spigot, then flinging myself into clothes, flinging food at the animals (ok, not AT them, but in their bowls) and then running, yes, HAULING down the block to catch the bus. I crossed the street and it crested the hill. Missing the bus would have been bad.
But the bus always affords me great 'copy'. There are all these new and interesting people there and I get to surmise what their lives are about. I'm sure I've got it all wrong, and very often am schooled in reality when they actually open their mouths to talk to me. Still, it's an adventure. I stand out on the bus. Usually the only white person who's pants aren't sagging with my hat on crooked. It's a strange and yet beautiful paradigm. I practice bus knitting and rate the people around me on a scale of A.L.C. For those of you who have not ridden public transit and therefore don't know about A.L.C, I shall explain. A.L.C stands for Acceptable Level of Crazy and if you are on the public transit, it is best to maintain a very tolerable A.L.C for the sake of everyone around you and your personal health. I've never experienced extreme violation of A.L.C, but my friend and neighbor got to watch police officers wrestle a man to the bus floor and forcibly remove him from the vehicle. He was exceeding the A.L.C. for reasons known only to him and the bus driver. Other things rank you in this category too.
For example:
- Talking, muttering, grunting like a Wildabeast (or Yak), or cussing loudly to yourself or at anyone else. I watched a large homeless (and crazy) man yell, no SCREAM, at an old man (a perfect stranger to him) who was waiting for the bus. I have no idea what it was about, but...exceeded the A.L.C.
- Touching people when there is plenty of room on the bus.
- Telling random strangers your life story while they are forced to sit next to you on their way to the next stop.
- Saying in the creepiest way possible "How you doin'." to a strange woman (ME!) at 6 frickin' 32 in the morning.
- I could go on.
Lest I put you off public transit, please let me say that these events are spread out over months and at their worst, add bit of spice to my life. The bus system, while it has it's flaws, is FREE for me because of the large Institution Type University I work for and for everyone else, cheaper, MUCH CHEAPER than driving. Plus, I am happy not to drive in rush hour traffic. It's like being chauffeured around! Me and about 20-40 other people, (depending on whether it's one of those double jobbies) but still.
So today, no one exceeded the A.L.C. but, you know, if they had, this post would be even MORE interesting, so who's to say it's an undesirable thing...for the sake of entertainment...
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