Evans House update

After much thinking about it and going through the ringer lately, Matt and I have decided that we don't need to separate again. I have been working really hard on not losing my temper over everything and Matt has been really working hard on making time for me. I really have enjoyed reaping the benefits of years of therapy lately. We forgive more quickly, talk about our feelings, practice kindness, take responsibility for ourselves...It's really nice. Yes, there are still the bumps in the road, which sometimes I sit down in front of, sob, and swear they are mountains. But all in all, it's on an uphill climb. Our life together is kind of like the stock market. Dips and peaks with a couple of crashes, but over all and over time, the trend is definitely upward.

It's coming up on my 31st birthday soon and I am having a big cookout on Saturday. Last year, I spent a lot of time struggling with being 'old', although I am not old. It was more about leaving the image of youth behind. I didn't know how to be anything BUT young. It's all I'd been, all my life. This year, I am not so freaked out. I am loved as I am, I am smart, I have experiences now that I never had in my youth. Being in my 30's is not so bad. In fact, I feel like I am finally hitting my stride! I dress in a way that makes me happy. I live in the world in a way that makes me happy. I don't struggle with "who am I?" much any more. I find myself to be beautiful, where in my teen years and beyond, I looked in the mirror and saw myself as lacking. I am not so afraid any more. Not that I think I can handle everything, but the knowledge that I can't and that it's OK, is a restful place. I'm no great politico, although I am still terribly opinionated. I am no supermodel, but I take care of my body and don't despise it. I am not one of the most brilliant minds of my time, but I like how I process things and am proud of the music I write and the little blurbs I write here. I like that I am still growing and changing and becoming the woman I was made to be. It's not really such a bad life.

As for the house, we move downstairs so we can start work on the upstairs. For now, the nasty carpet up there will serve as a drop-cloth as we fix the places where the plaster has come off, repair some of the woodwork and paint. No big renovation plans yet. The bathroom will have to be updated (or something! We haven't decided exactly what yet), since it is not very usable right now, but other than that, it's pretty cosmetic work. Then the carpet will come up and redoing the floors will begin. It'll be quite a job, but that's off in the future and for now, it's kinda cozy living on the bottom floor. Like going back to 2 bedrooms!

One last note...Matt has been a contractor with his Employer since February and this past Friday, they offered him a full time position!! He has worked his butt off to make that happen, so praise where praise is due. He is so excited and I am so happy for him. It's a good thing we are staying put this Holiday Season...the changeover in pay schedules will be a little tight! Overall, we are grateful and excited.

See you at my party!