Thursday, May 22, 2014

Breakfast Adventures: Eggs Benedict

I'm not gonna lie to you.  Cooking with kids is a huge pain in the patella.  It would be heaps easier to do this by myself while Matt kept the masses entertained, but that isn't the point, is it?  And plus, when have I EVER done things the easy way?  Never.  So with out further ado...Eggs Benedict.

Helping me is the "Egg Master" who was throwing a major fit this morning.  Ah...Three.  The year from hell.  Why is that?  Hormones?  Growing?  Super verbal but not super capable?  Who knows.  Three kinda sucks from time to time.  I'm trying to pretend it isn't that bad.  Kid #1 barely made it out of Three alive.  Or I did.  One or the other.  I can't remember.  I have PTSD from that time in her life.  But Kid #2, is IN IT.  And I am pretending he is not. 

Eggs Benedict
So...Egg Master he was.  Look how his eyes turn to half moons when he smiles.  I love those half moons.  I could eat him up! (When he is not screaming on the floor.  This too shall pass...this too shall pass)

We poached a CRAP LOAD of eggs, and by CRAP LOAD, I mean 8, which isn't that many considering there are 5 of us and everyone here usually eats 2, except Kid #3, who eats one, and Papa bear sometimes eats 3, which brings us to 9-10 eggs, typically consumed around here, but who has a pan that big, so 8 it was.  They rested in a pie pan of hot (but not cooking hot) water on the back of the stove, while we made the Hollandaise sauce.  I should have taken a picture of that.  Pie pan full of floating poached egg eyes.  Mmmm.  Creepy.

On to the Hollandaise sauce, which was pretty easy and the kids were fascinated by the fact that the egg yolk can come loose from the white.  The tricky part is to remember to let the butter come to room temp, which takes some planning, or at least some kind of forethought, which totally didn't happen, so microwave it was!  

Eggs Benedict
This photo is totally staged because Hollandaise sauce has to be stirred constantly and quickly and while she is awesome, she cannot yet whisk.

Eggs Benedict
This photo is not staged, because Kid #3 likes to be RIGHT UNDER MY FEET, like a puppy, hoping for treats to fall from the stove.  I wish I were kidding.  We call them "floor snacks" because it happens so often and he is SO fast.  Oh, and that is a large wooden bead.  Not food.  Which I promptly removed.  Choking hazard!

Then the kids totally bolted on me and I was left to toast English Muffins all alone and then toast them again with Canadian bacon, which is really just ham and so that is what we used.

Eggs Benedict
The result of all our hard work in the kitchen!

Matt: (Sir Not Appearing in this Film, "Don't photograph me.") "SAAAAAY! I DO like Eggs Benedict." (Green Eggs and Ham reference for those of you who are not currently immersed in the Seuss cannon)"You should make these more." (to which I replied, "A bit too involved for every day.  Maybe Father's Day?")

Eggs Benedict
  Cora took a photo of me at breakfast.  Awesome. 

Me: "Lemony! Buttery! I like this. It would probably be better with an English Muffin, but since I am gluten free and had no GF English muffins, I had mine on the plate, on some Canadian bacon ham, and it was still pretty awesome.
Eggs Benedict
Kid #1: "Mmmmmmm!" (and cleaned her plate, so I know it was the truth)

Eggs Benedict
Kid #2: "Yum!" But only had 2 bites so probably not his favorite.  It could just also be that he is THREE.  Blerg.
Eggs Benedict
Kid #3: Didn't throw it or spit it.  Ate pieces of poached egg and ate some Hollandaise sauce off of my finger, but was not to excited about it.  Blueberries and strawberries for this kid, mostly.

So 3 out of 5 approve! (and the 2 disapproving are too young to REALLY appreciate what they are eating, right?)

Eggs Benedict
A selfie with my best girl/Sous Chef.

Eggs Benedict Eggs Benedict
A mercurial moment with kid #2, who is so very, very THREE, bless his heart. 

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