Do-overs and Cabbage Stew

Peace is an elusive thing, sometimes.  The weight of the world is always more than I can hold, but in an effort to feel safe and secure, I attempt to lift that weight and make my life into what it should be.  Then I get overwhelmed and freak out  (What?  Ariana, freak out?  Surely you jest!) because that is an impossible job!  So I'm slowing down and breathing and sitting still and trusting that things will work for good.  They always do. 

  In the mean time, I can start again.  I can be kind when I want to be grumpy. I can be silent when I want to be bitchy.  I can make stew when the grocery budget gets low and it will all be ok.  I can satisfy my knitting needs with stash yarn or unraveling that first scarf I knitted for Matt (in gorgeous wool that reminded me of the ocean - but wool makes him itch), and remaking it into something new.  I can take things moment by moment until peace returns.  I get a do-over for the day.  At 1:15 pm.  And again at 1:16 pm and 1:17 pm if I need it.  And like the scarf, I can trust that I am being re-made into something new and beautiful.  Besides...living in fear only gives me heartburn.