Third trimester sleep - much like chutes and ladders

Image from here

Remember that game from when we were kids called Chutes and Ladders? The object was to get from 1 to 100, but if you landed on a ladder,you could skip some squares...a chute? All the way back down. Sometimes to nearly the beginning! There was no rhyme or reason beyond the luck of the roll, except if you looked closely at the pictures. At the top of the chute was always a careless behavior, while at the bottom of the ladder was something more 'responsible.' Now imagine if you will, those chutes and ladders are on a grid with hours of the night on it. I was making one in photoshop, but got tired.

This all came to me about 3 am, when I got up for my first trip to the potty and I realized, I spend my night hours trying to beat the clock for sleep. If my first trip to the potty is before 2 am...look out. I've done something that day that will make it very hard to sleep. (Unfortunately there are no helpful pictures to show me what behaviors to avoid!) Here's how the night could go... ('sleep' is ladder, 'wide awake' is chute)

Start
Drank lots of water today! Sleep 2 hours
Ooops. Drank a little too much. Wake up after an hour to have to pee - Wide awake one half hour
Exercised today! Sleep 3 hours
Over did it. Sore muscles make body uncomfortable - Wide awake an hour
Late night cravings – If chocolate Wide Awake 4 hours
Late night cravings - if protein AND if I can find it in the dark - sleep one hour
Husband snoring – Wide awake 1 hour - will probably have to pee again.
Ate healthy meals all day, not too much carbs or sugar – Sleep 3 hours
Body randomly rejects food – Wide awake 1/2 hour in bathroom.
Worry about the nursery – Wide awake 1 hour
Baby decides to have a dance party in your uterus – Wide awake ½ hour
Swelling causes loss of sensation and sharp pain in hands – Wide awake 2 hours (if can find tylenol in the dark)
Warm bath – Sleep 3 hours
Husband steals body pillow in the night - Wide awake 1/2 hour with sore tummy from no support. (steal it back!)
Yoga poses did great things for muscles - sleep 2 hours
Yoga helps digestion system speed up - Wide awake in bathroom 1/4 hour (with lights out) 1/2 (with lights on) - am very skilled at pottying in the dark at this point.
Forgot to take dog out for one last potty before bed - dog licks hand at 6 am - Wide awake from then on.
Took dog potty last night and all the stars align - Sleep till 8am. Inexplicably still tired and sore. Do morning yoga to recover from sleeping.
Finish

I wish I could make a clever board game for this! Wouldn't it be a fun game to play at baby showers? Hmmm. On second thought it might be too close to reality to be fun.